My last, my final year of high school has officially ended. I finished all of my horrific IB exams, said my goodbyes, and graduated. Looking back on it, these past few weeks have felt like they lasted a lot longer than they actually have. And through all this, for it really was an ending, I did not cry once. It feels sort of odd, really. Of course, I don't cry naturally, but still, it seems like an odd thing to not have shed a tear. Though, the more I think about it, the more that strange feeling dies away. I will see my friends again, even if only over summer. We all parted with pretty words, but none of us intend for those to be the last words we will say to each other. That's what it all boils down to. I've come this far, and I'm not ready to put an end to my knowing them just yet. That may seem silly and naive, so let me clarify: I do not expect for all of us to see each other as often as we had, but I do believe that when we do see each other again we will be able to fall right back to where we left off. For this reason, I am not really sad.
What's more, I have done a lot of thinking lately ((a common theme for this blog; I have noticed)). As a result of this, I feel as if a large weight has been lifted from my shoulders. That is the glory of a good epiphany every now and again. It leaves you feeling refreshed, light as a feather, and as if you are ready to take on the world all at once. My epiphany was this: Life is mine, and it is my job for the time being to just keep living it. ((Remember that phrase?)) I discovered a while back who I want to be and as for this summer, it is time to start fully applying this 'new me' to my everyday life. As far as I'm concerned, I owe this to myself, and I don't have to worry about anything else. And that alone, removes a lot of stress and a lot of confusion I had been going through lately. A lot of which, I had been neglecting as of late, because of my dealing with the end of school.
With this, and taking everything into account, I believe I can finally answer the question I posed to you a couple posts back: "Where am I?" I am standing ((metaphorically of course)) at the edge of a new beginning. Things haven't truly stopped, nor have they began anew, yet. Life is slowing down, and entering into a small transition phase. Like the Phoenix, I will not flat reach a flat out ending but a bridge into a new beginning. And for the first time in a long time, I am truly excited just to live my life, and see where it takes me. This is what my summer will be dedicated to.
Now it's your turn. I asked you where you were, and I hope you really took the time to think about that. But for now, no matter where you decided you were, you have reached and opportunity to set something in motion; something maybe you've been thinking over for a long time, or maybe something you've been neglecting recently. This is your chance! What will you dedicate your summer to?
Signing off,
The Ace of Spades
No comments:
Post a Comment